Snippets of Funny Things

Have you ever walked out of a room with a rug (not wall to wall carpet) in it and walked back in later to find the rug messed up?  What happens to the rug when we leave the room?  Are there invisible gremlins in our houses that love to make us feel crazy?  Do they laugh when they see that our minds are churning to solve the issue of a rug being out of place when we return to the room?

When we are walking and trip, have you ever noticed that we look back to see what the culprit was?  We glare at it!  Are we trying to make the object feel bad for being there when we didn’t watch for a problem in our path? 

It is almost inevitable now days to go into a women’s restroom and a cell phone rings.  Is someone watching to see when someone visits?  Are women setting timers for their phones to ring so they don’t feel alone in the bathroom?

For all the people and birds in the world, isn’t it amazing that there are not more people that get pooped on by the birds?  Is the average 1 in 1000?  How many people do you know that have collected bird poop on their clothes or hair?

Has someone asked you how you feel and you have said one of the following:  like the loser in a prize fight; run over by a Mac truck; gone through the ringer of a wash machine?  Let’s hope none of us find out how those things really feel!  

It has been said that silence is a source of great strength.  There are many types of silence, for instance: anger, grief, sadness and confusion.  The most comforting is said to be the state of being at peace. Using silence takes practice and one of the crucial parts of that practice is observing; observing your own breathing, your thoughts, your feelings and your sensations. 

The ability to remain calm comes in handy when you have moments in life that require the focus of your emotions.  Maintaining calmness and focus under emotional upheaval can save a life.

There is a large body of research that suggests meditation as a form of relief from stress, high blood pressure, and anxiety.  We train our bodies, why not train our minds?

Meditation doesn’t mean you have to sit on the floor in a certain position.  In fact, you can meditate walking in the park…anywhere and anytime you can be quiet for a while.  No special equipment is needed, no special training, just quiet moments.

Balancing those moments with loud and long laughter is crucial to your well being.   A few years ago, I took a class on meditation and could not get focused on being quiet.  I ended up leaving the class and so did a few others since they were laughing uncontrollably.   We had a case of the giggles!  Some days, your body and mind can be quiet and others…well, it just isn’t your day for that.

In Sync with your Desk

What kind of relationship do you have with your desk?   Most people that have desks, love them.  Despite the growing trend of expecting workers to work on the go, we humans like our desks and can easily make one where ever we happen to be.

Desks can hold books, notes, calendars and of course computers…almost all that a person would need to do their chosen work and communicate effectively with others. 

Some creative minds like having things visible as they never know how stray thoughts can fit together.  Others like their desk to be organized so nothing distracts them from what they are doing at the time.  I have read that people with messier desks are more open to new ideas.  No matter what type of person you are, is seems that if when your workspace is in sync with you, you are a happier more productive individual.

In an office environment, we tend to think of the desk as protection between us and others than intrude our office.  For some, just knowing they have a desk, brings comfort.  For others it is their home away from home.   To most people it is their workspace and they need it to retreat from endless meetings, unrealistic deadlines, constant interruptions, and the time-consuming supervision of others.

Grab that little piece of chocolate stashed in the top drawer and close your eyes for a moment.  Ahhh…now THAT’S  what desks are really for.

Keep going Until We Stop

Scott Stratten spoke at a "TED" event.

For those that don't know, it's an event where speakers go for 5-18
minutes on one idea.

This video is well worth your time!  Take a look!

The session is called "Keep Going Until We Stop"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Cakm2nIQWo

Modern Conveniences…Taking them for Granted

Have you thought about how modern conveniences save you time, let you enjoy life more, or are just a wonderful part of your life?

Most of us don’t.  We take them for granted.  We are spoiled in all the modern conveniences and have come to believe we deserve them.  They have become so much a part of our lives; we give little thought to them, unless they are temporarily taken away.  We panic if we can’t find our cell phones, even when we are at home!

If your electricity goes off in the night, you get a wake-up call (not literally) on taking the electricity for granted.  You also get to show your skills on time-management!  A nice two-for-one.

The bathroom is another place we take for granted.  Running water at our disposal 24/7 --- a luxury that the pioneers couldn’t dream of.  The only time we have to go without water is when our pipes freeze or the water heater has decided it is done with our ungratefulness.  A rare occurrence.  Sometimes we get more than we bargained for when our facet water can be lit on fire but for the most part, we take it for granted that when we turn on the facet, clean water spews out quickly.

Yes, in our modern lives we complain about bosses that are expecting too much of us.   NEWS FLASH!  We all get the same amount of time in a day.   We have companies that will bring us food, already cooked, when we want it; deliver clean clothes to our door; we can order nearly everything our heart desires.  We don’t have to plan our lives since we can go online, order what we want in the blink of an eye with a credit card number and have it delivered tomorrow.  After all, purchases have become emotional decisions and life is stressful.   Has stress become the catch-all for our debt mismanagement?

Can you imagine pioneers getting emotional about flour and sugar?  Chopping wood in minus 30 degree weather to heat the water for a bath or to cook a meal?  Do you think they could comprehend, “emotional eating?”

In our modern day lives, most of us are not capable of making sacrifices.  We only have to pop that container on the corner of the counter and turn on the oven because nothing says lovin’ like something in the oven!

Apple 3G Phone for Dummies

I hate talking about relationships on the internet, but this one isn’t with another person, it is with my iPhone.  Almost two years ago, I got an iPhone.  I was so excited to have it since it was considered an “exclusive” for cell phone users.  It was a gift.   I saw how much other new users enjoyed it and I was thrilled to have one.  I’ll admit that I enjoyed all the bells and whistles that came with it.  Once the glow of having one wore off, I started to see if for what it was.  Oh, wait, this seems like a “person” relationship.

Here are a few things that have become a source of frustration over the last 20 months of my relationship with this phone.

You can have full bars and the call still gets dropped.  3G and full bars mean NOTHING!  As with any phone, the calls get dropped in the middle of huge cities where cell phone towers are abundant… but, it seems to enjoy the outskirts of towns.  When you get out in the country, well, your phone is about as worthless as a tin can…okay, not that bad, you can still text but using the phone as a phone is not an OPTION.

Although 3G was “the best” when the phones came out, my iPhone tends to forget that it is a mobile phone.  The phone works well in the house, most of the time, but get it in the car and it suddenly gets Alzheimer’s.  It can’t remember where I am or where I want to go!

GPS navigation?  You have got to be kidding!  This phone has serious issues! This navigation can’t take you anywhere…ok, maybe to the bathroom, but most people remember that one on their own.

All those apps are fun at first then you realize you can’t use them for very long since the battery wears down so quickly.  The battery needs to be recharged about 3 times a day.  Yes, it eats more power than most humans eat food!

The inconsistency of alerts is amazing!  You chose one tone for the text messages and the crazy phone will do another sometimes when a text comes in…what tha…?  In fact, it uses the same tone you have picked for your “new email” alert.  GREAT!  So, you think an email came in and can attend to it later when it was really a text saying, there is an emergency at work you need to make a PRIORITY!  The reminder of appointments is annoying since you put them in your phone thinking it will be nice and remind you of them, sometimes the phone reminder won’t go off until you slide the slider.  Can you say, ANNOYING?

The auto brightness is inconsistent also.  You can go out in the sunlight and it should automatically be brighter or go indoors and it should be darker…but that isn’t what happens.  Sometimes it works and sometimes…well, you are on your own.  Why take the time to set settings that just can’t seem to work for you 85% of the time?

One last thing.  The phone will allow you to multi-task when you are on a call…sometimes.  There seems to be no rhyme or reason for when it allows you to multi-task and when it doesn’t.  It just seems to allow less and less access to the things I thought I needed to make my life EASIER.

On the PLUS side, the phone does have an on-screen keyboard, so it saves you from flipping the keyboard out each time you need to use it…BUT, you guessed it, it is again inconsistent as to when the keyboard shows up.  Sometimes, it never does…like times when you want to make a list; it seems to forget that you need the keyboard to do that.

You need a crystal ball to work this phone!!!!!

Tell me, how do you like your cell phone?  Is it what you thought it would be when you signed up?  Has it made your life easier or more complicated?  Has it become one of those necessary evils in your life?  Has your relationship lost its new spark before the contract is up?  Is this all too familiar?

Southwest Airlines Rules and Regulations

Okay, I get it that I am a very “interesting” person.  I have been told that many times and if I had a quarter for each of them I can remember, I would not be writing to you today!  I would be sitting on a beach in Cancun sipping a fruity drink.  Since that didn’t happen, here I am today, writing about something equally interesting…Southwest Airlines’ special luggage rules.

Ah, come on, don’t be like that. 

Here are some rules I thought were unique and because I like to give fair warning, please make note of these in case you are planning a trip soon!  Southwest takes these rules seriously!

Alcohol

Alcohol content may not exceed 70% by volume (140 proof).

I didn’t even know they made alcohol with that large of a percentage!  Shows you how long it has been since I had a drink!  Sounds like it would kill anything in your body and maybe your body too!

Can you even read the bottle after you have drank alcohol that is 140 proof?  Who would care what proof it was?

Dry Cell Batteries (these are everyday batteries)
Any Alkaline, NiCad, Nickel Metal Hydride (NiMH), Silver Oxide and Carbon Zinc batteries similar to those used in flashlights or commonly used electronic devices are allowed onboard the aircraft.

These items must be securely installed in equipment or have exposed terminals protected in a manner to prevent short circuit. Electrical tape, individually bagging batteries in sealable plastic bags, or plastic covers designed to protect the terminals from short circuit would all meet this requirement.

Are you kidding me?  They have to be securely installed in equipment?  Who knew electronics would work if you didn’t do that?

Film

The screening equipment that inspects your checked luggage may damage undeveloped film in camera equipment. We recommend that you put undeveloped film and cameras containing undeveloped film in your carryon baggage. The screening equipment will not damage camera images.

There are two different types of screening equipment?  One for carry on and one for baggage going in the baggage compartment?  Does the baggage in baggage compartment get screened better?  Or maybe not at all?  How can the carry on screening process not damage film but see through my clothes?  Technology!  Ain’t it great!?

Animals

The carrier may contain two (2) cats or dogs and must be of the same species per carrier.

No mixing species, people!

The animals must be harmless, not disruptive, odorless, and require no attention during flight.

Good thing there are no rules like this for the passengers.  The plane would be mostly empty!

Musical Instruments

Reservations must be made and a ticket must be purchased at a charge no greater than the Child's Fare. Musical instruments cannot be transported in place of a free companion under any fare promotion.

Okay, you know this rule was made because someone tried this and because there wasn’t a rule yet, the airline had to let them do it, once.

Firearms

Our Customers must declare the gun to the Customer Service Agent at the ticket counter (no firearms will be accepted curbside) and ensure that the firearm(s) chambers are free of ammunition and the magazine clip has been removed (when applicable). Paintball guns and BB guns are considered the same as all other firearms.

Can you just see someone getting tired of waiting in line, shouting, “gun” so they can cut ahead?  Everyone would move out of their way and let them through!  No one would be angry at them for it; at least not the first time they did it.

Parachutes

Parachutes are allowed in checked or carryon baggage, but may not be worn in flight.

You know it will be a bad flight when you see a passenger wearing a parachute!  Without any announcements, you might as well grab your carry-on bag and get off the plane NOW!

Overnight Amenity Kits for Lost Luggage

One of the best kept secrets is the small overnight kits available for lost luggage.  The most you will get is:  shampoo, soap, a toothbrush and toothpaste, a razor and sometimes a little laundry soap to wash out those undies you will have to wear again tomorrow.  ;-)  I know, it sounds gross but you will survive.  You think going without underwear would be better?

When you receive your kit, you will quickly realize that you have been over packing all this time.  Amazing what you can and do get by with in a pinch.  We are all survivors!  (can you hear the “Rocky” theme song?)