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Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Leftover candy from Halloween



Instead of telling you 50 ways to use the leftover candy from Halloween:  I say, “Toss it out!”  You can thank me later.


The only good candy is candy in pictures.  It looks delicious, but you can’t smell it (unless it is in a scratch and sniff book) but do you know where the previous fingernails have been?  Do you really want to go there?  You can’t eat it (even in secret)… and it never goes to your hips or waist because it can’t be eaten.  The perfect candy!


Do you regret buying all that candy when you knew there were only going to be a handful of kids coming to your door to “trick or treat” last night?  Or did you get an abundance of candy as your reward for being so generous to little children that dress in silly costumes and walk up and down the block in the dark yelling “trick or treat” after they ring people’s doorbell? 



Halloween is the time when the rules go out the window, it appears.  Children can be outside alone walking the streets after dark, they can approach strangers, panhandle for candy, and drag all the crap…I mean, candy back to their house without consequences.


Did you promise yourself that you would not buy candy this year but did it anyway?  You remembered your training in the scouts:  always be prepared, didn’t you?

Did you buy the candy you like or what you thought the little munchkins would enjoy?  Did you do your research?  Or did you just buy what was “on sale” the day you visited the store?

Were you thinking about how many cavities you were contributing to this year?  Hmmm.  How about how much money that will cost you as a taxpayer this year to fix those little teeth in Medicaid costs?  Hmmm.


One more thing: Remember the wicked witch from the Wizard of Oz?  She melted because the water had sugar in it, not from the water itself.  Why do you think that little bit of water killed her and put out the fire on the scarecrow?  Pure water can’t do that!


Guess we found one good way to use sugar after all…